Look inward ☁️

My therapist told me to look inward, and I thought he said “Look, N-word.”

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Related posts tagged 'Foam corner'

Coins are so worthless now that it’s gone from “You can keep the change” to “Can you keep the change?”
When someone talks about like, “I just met this girl and she was down for whatever.” That just means like ass fucking. That’s the only other thing!
I’m actually pretty sad. My therapist died a couple days ago and I have no one to talk to about it. When I get really sad like this, I find solace in just thinking that my wife probably won’t be born for another 30 years.
I hate smoking sections, unless we’re talking about the movie The Mask, with Jim Carrey. Then the smoking section is my favorite part!
I know it’s not true, but I feel like twins get half the stuff in the womb.
I’ve decided that how much it would cost for me to only eat Vienna sausages in those little cans at 7-11 for two weeks straight, that’s all I eat, is $60,000 tax free. I just thought about that and I think that’s the amount it would take.
If there’s three people sitting in the back seat of a car or something… Say I’m in the middle, and Huell and Michael are on either side of me, and people go: “Hey that’s a Huell and Michael sandwich!” But no, cause you don’t identify a sandwich by its bread. You don’t say it’s a white-bread sandwich.
You know how there’s like candy and mints in bathrooms sometimes? That’s the last place I want by open food is around all this shit!
This is just a beef I have with The Wallflowers’s Song “One Headlight.” There’s a lyric in there that goes “I turn the engine but the engine doesn’t turn.” So you didn’t turn the engine, you motherfucker! Just the key!

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Related posts tagged 'Phone corner'

It’s silly that when you’re in a cold car and you want heat, cold air comes out first and it makes you colder. They should fix that!
It’s funny that if air comes out of your butthole, it’s gross. If it comes out of your mouth, it’s funny. And if it comes out of your penis, it’s cool.
Downhill and uphill are both bad, it’s weird that they both mean a bad thing. “It’s all downhill from here” or “it’s all uphill from here.” Those are both shitty!
I’m not impressed by juggling. Ok whatever you learned how to do that. That’s not a thing I chose to learn.
It sucks knowing my kids will never know what it’s like to go to a Blockbuster. Cause I’m not letting ‘em go there. The prices are outrageous!
That reminded me of when Mike and Omar would take out the trash when they were young boys... Good Epps.
I hate smoking sections, unless we’re talking about the movie The Mask, with Jim Carrey. Then the smoking section is my favorite part!