I don’t know if I necessarily felt voiceless at the time, but in some ways I was. With my stepmother, I couldn’t go, “Hey, are you drinking and driving right now? What’s in the cup?” I’m just buckled in the backseat, making my sisters laugh by fake-humping her from behind. Was it my way of processing it? I think so. Things with her were awkward, and I usually search for times where I was put in a weird position and try to make it funny.
I put stuff in my act about that because it is how I process or deal with something — I felt like it was out of my nature to not talk about it. But ironically, I had to force myself. It would make my hands shake and I would often put one hand in my armpit. I had a lot of support. I had loved ones say, “It was difficult to watch, but I’m glad you’re okay talking about it.” Then I went to a healing-trauma program in Tennessee called Onsite and worked through a lot of this. You don’t leave these places cured, you just take steps in the right direction. But one of the takeaways was: Some things are sacred. Your life doesn’t have to be an open book. It just took someone telling me, “You don’t hav...
I have things that I definitely want to tackle onstage, but I need more distance from those things I think. I am working on understanding those things because they are not funny to me yet but they will be someday. I hope. Because therapy ain't cheap.
When I talk about my cancer on stage, doing standup, it is a cathartic experience. And it is important to be honest and talk about things that matter, even dark and scary things. The special that we shot about my cancer helped a lot of people. Early detection is the key to survival. So if you ever feel sick, or that something may be wrong with your body. Go to the doctor, don't be afraid. It could save your life.
I think dystopian future movies are more saying that life is going to get so hard for people that nothing will be funny, but that’s never been true. During the terrible times of the Great Depression, there were great works of meaningful art that came out of it, like The Grapes of Wrath. Comedy was huge back then. Comedy is an escape from things getting so difficult.
Comedy is fun, and there’s a lot of times when I’ll be having a bad day and after doing a podcast, or doing stand up or something, I begin to feel better. But really, what’s helped my mental health is therapy. I mean, go to a professional for that. People are fond of saying that “such and such” is “my therapy,” and that’s great if it works for you, but I don’t think you really understand what therapy is and why people need it. And if you don’t need it, then great, good for you. I think therapy is a thing that everybody can benefit from—you don’t have to have deep emotional instability in order to get something out of it. It’s just there to help you with your interpersonal relationships. Mean...
Beth Stelling