This is a character that’s only read the word “thermometer” but has never said it out loud: “Hey, what temperature does it say on that thermo-meter?”
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Related posts tagged 'Foam corner'
This character was inspired by Friday Night Lights. It’s a shy, Texan teenager who’s trying to get his coach’s attention: “Cayouch! Cayouch! Cayouch? Cayouch! Cayouch? Cayouch! Excuse me, cayouch?”
This is a new character, he’s called Harvey Dangerfield: “I’m not sick but I’m not well, I get no respect!” That’s it.
I think that an e-mail should be called an e-letter. You say, “I just got an e-mail”, but you wouldn’t say “I just got a mail.” You’d sound stupid.
I’m pretty sad today. I just had my first unenjoyable Gotye listening session. I knew it was coming but now it’s just “Somebody That I Used to Know” that I used to know.
You know how everyone says to get your porn name; you use your pet’s name and the street you grew up on? I have a new system and it works for anybody. Take your first name; change it to “Sir”. Then take your last name and change it to “Fucksalot”.
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Related posts tagged 'Phone corner'
It’s weird that pineapple supposedly makes your semen taste better, yet semen makes pineapple taste terrible!
Toothpicks are bullshit. They don’t work. If you have something in your teeth, they won’t get it out. They’re thicker than every tooth gap.
I bought a book on how to read. That thing was impossible to get through! (Then Scott explains that they did that exact joke – but better – on his TV show).
I went to a Jack-in-the-Box that was open 24 hours and I got there at the 26th hour and it was closed.
It’s silly that when you’re in a cold car and you want heat, cold air comes out first and it makes you colder. They should fix that!
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